A Call to Battle

This short but powerful and awesome video is for all men out there. There is an ongoing 'crisis in masculinity' today and it has devastating effects to our society as a whole. All the evil that we currently witness in the world today can be traced back to this 'crisis in masculinity' where men abandon their responsibilities and fail to live up to that noble vocation he is called to be. Let us all rediscover once again our true identity as men after Christ's image and wage a battle against every form of evil, sin, and corruption in our society starting in our own family.

The Catholic 'Man Crisis'

We have a Catholic 'man crisis' today. We have men who were raised in the faith but are not practicing it. We have men who are awfully ignorant of what the Scriptures and the Catechism teach on moral issues affecting our society today. We have men who have left the Church and have failed to commit themselves fully to Jesus Christ. It is no wonder we are confronted with so many evils and crises today. On this excerpt from an interview with Cardinal Burke by The New Emangelization, he gives us a picture of the current state of men in the Church today. For the complete transcript, please visit this link. We do not need 'nice men'; we need 'real men'.


I think there has been a great confusion with regard to the specific vocation of men in marriage and of men in general in the Church during the past 50 years or so. It’s due to a number of factors, but the radical feminism which has assaulted the Church and society since the 1960s has left men very marginalized.

Unfortunately, the radical feminist movement strongly influenced the Church, leading the Church to constantly address women’s issues at the expense of addressing critical issues important to men; the importance of the father, whether in the union of marriage or not; the importance of a father to children; the importance of fatherhood for priests; the critical impact of a manly character; the emphasis on the particular gifts that God gives to men for the good of the whole society.

The goodness and importance of men became very obscured, and for all practical purposes, were not emphasized at all. This is despite the fact that it was a long tradition in the Church, especially through the devotion of St. Joseph, to stress the manly character of the man who sacrifices his life for the sake of the home, who prepares with chivalry to defend his wife and his children and who works to provide the livelihood for the family. So much of this tradition of heralding the heroic nature of manhood has been lost in the Church today.

All of those virtuous characteristics of the male sex are very important for a child to observe as they grow up and mature. The healthy relationship with the father helps the child to prepare to move from the intimate love of the mother, building a discipline so that the child can avoid excessive self‑love. This ensures that the child is able to identify himself or herself properly as a person in relationship with others; this is critical for both boys and girls.

A child’s relationship with their father is key to a child’s self‑identification, which takes places when we are growing up. We need that very close and affirming relationship with the mother, but at the same time, it is the relationship with the father, which is of its nature more distant but not less loving, which disciplines our lives. It teaches a child to lead a selfless life, ready to embrace whatever sacrifices are necessary to be true to God and to one another.

I recall in the mid-1970’s, young men telling me that they were, in a certain way, frightened by marriage because of the radicalizing and self-focused attitudes of women that were emerging at that time. These young men were concerned that entering a marriage would simply not work because of a constant and insistent demanding of rights for women. These divisions between women and men have gotten worse since then.

Everyone understands that women have and can be abused by men. Men who abuse women are not true men, but false men who have violated their own manly character by being abusive to women.

The crisis between man and woman has been made much worse by a complete collapse of catechesis in the Church. Young men grew up without proper instruction with regard to their faith and to the knowledge of their vocation. Young men were not being taught that they are made in the image of God – Father, Son and Holy Spirit. These young men were not taught to know all those virtues that are necessary in order to be a man and to fulfill the particular gifts of being male.

Making things worse, there was a very fluffy, superficial kind of catechetical approach to the question of human sexuality and the nature of the marital relationship.

At the same time, in society, there came an explosion of pornography, which is particularly corrosive for men because it terribly distorts the whole reality of human sexuality. It leads men and women to view their human sexuality apart from a relationship between a man and woman in marriage.

In truth, the gift of sexual attraction is directed toward marriage, and any kind of sexual union belongs properly only within marriage. But the whole world of pornography corrupts young people into believing that their sexual capacity is for their own entertainment and pleasure, and becomes a consuming lust, which is one of the seven capital sins.

The gift of human sexuality is turned into a means of self‑gratification often at the expense of another person, whether in heterosexual relations or in homosexual relations. A man who has not been formed with a proper identity as a man and as a father figure will ultimately become very unhappy. These poorly formed men become addicted to pornography, sexual promiscuity, alcohol, drugs, and the whole gamut of addictions.

How Does One Become a Committed Catholic Man?

(Taken from Aleteia and The New Emangelization websites)

1. Each Catholic man must to be able to give a rousing argument for why Jesus Christ is the greatest Man and why Jesus is his King -- If a man is not convinced about Christ’s greatness to the point of being able to articulate the case, his growth in faith will be stunted and he will be unable to draw others to Christ. Committed Catholic Men can make the case for Christ.

2. Commit to be a Saint of Christ the King -- There are no nice people or good people in Heaven, only Saints. Most men have not made a commitment to strive for Sainthood. Men are stuck in mediocrity and need to raise the bar higher; there is no higher bar than Sainthood. 

Christ’s first words of public ministry were to “Repent!” and every man must repent or die.

By making a commitment to Sainthood, a man starts with repentance and aspires to greatness; in this he realizes his own spiritual poverty. In the recognition of spiritual poverty, a man comes to both humbly recognize his need for God’s mercy and to cry out for it. Aspiring to Sainthood changes everything.

3. Go to Reconciliation at least once a month -- While the Church teaches each man must go to Reconciliation at least once a year, any man who is truthful with himself and Christ knows he needs the Sacrament of Reconciliation much more frequently.

Keep a guide to Reconciliation with you, recalling regularly the 10 Commandments. Make the commitment to go to Reconciliation on a pre-determined schedule each month and go to Reconciliation immediately when you fall into grave sin (e.g. when you view pornography). Regular and frequent Reconciliation changes men, for supernatural Grace flows to men during Absolution.

4. Pray for 15 minutes every day -- Only about a third of Catholic men pray daily; some smaller number, a much smaller number, pray for 15 minutes. How can a man know Jesus if he never talks to Him? He can’t.



Commit to get to know Christ the King on a personal basis by approaching His Throne and talking with Him every day for 15 minutes.It is in this personal conversation that Christ will make His will known to each man.

5. Discover the majestic manliness of the Mass -- The Mass is the “source and summit” of the Catholic faith, and yet, the majority of men claim to “be bored by the Mass” and to “not get anything out of the Mass”. This is because they don’t know what is occurring in the Mass: they have little understanding of the manly symbolism of the Mass, a Sacrament that has been devoutly passed down for 2000 years. 

They don’t realize that during the Mass they are witnesses to the actual Bloody Sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the Cross.

If a man doesn’t actively participate in the Mass because of ignorance and boredom, he can’t receive the Graces that flow from the Eucharist. Learn the Mass to such a degree that you can explain it to others with the reverence and devotion that Christ’s Sacrifice deserves.

6. Participate in Sunday Mass + 1 -- It is the minimum obligation of each Catholic man to attend Mass every Sunday; but only about a quarter of men do so on any given week. This is both a catechetical failure and an outrageous insult to Our King.

In addition to attending Mass every Sunday, each man should go an additional step to encounter the Eucharist at least one more time during the week either by participating in daily Mass or by kneeling in Adoration for 30 minutes.

Most men have much to make up for and precious little time; drawing closer to Christ more regularly will help men make up for lost time.

A warning: Never approach the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin.

7. Pray the Rosary regularly and carry the Rosary with you --  Only about 40% of Catholic men ever pray the Rosary, and only 1 in 10 carry their Rosary with them.

Praying the Rosary draws a man closer to our Holy Mother and to her Son, Jesus Christ; it is the manliest of rituals, prayed by the greatest Saints over centuries, in quiet places and in the din of the battlefield. It is a manly act of loyalty and fidelity.

Commit to carry the Rosary as a sign of your loyalty and faith and as a weapon against the daily onslaught of Satan; Satan hates the Rosary and fears it. Have the Rosary handy at all times to pray a decade in times of gratitude and stress, relying on the Holy Mother to bring your prayers to Jesus Christ.

The Rosary is part of the uniform of the Committed Catholic Man.

8. Get to know your Patron Saint and Guardian Angel -- We believe in a Communion of Saints. Many men don’t have a personal relationship with a Saint or their Guardian Angel. Many men don’t feel connected to the Church, in part because they are not connected to the Saints or to the Guardian Angel that Jesus Christ has appointed for each man.

Saints and Angels intercede on men’s behalf and stand by to protect and defend men from daily assault of Satan and his demons. Don’t go into daily battle without a Saint and your Guardian Angel guarding your back.

9. Read Holy Scripture for 15 minutes each day -- All of Holy Scripture is about Jesus Christ. When a man reads Holy Scripture, Jesus Christ is with him, not figuratively or conceptually, but in a real and actual way. Jesus Himself came to earth to speak the words of Scripture for all men, across all time, to read and contemplate, drawing strength and wisdom and Grace from His words.

Reading Holy Scripture can be done by working through books of the Bible and by reading/praying the Divine Office.

A man can’t know Jesus Christ without contemplating His Word.

10. Be a priest, prophet and king in your home -- In the face of a secular culture that attacks valid patrimony, Catholic men need to reassert their rightful roles as priest, prophet and king of their family.

We are not talking about being a chauvinistic tyrant, but a true Saint of Christ, with each man serving his wife and children with humble sacrifice, holy example and courageous commitment to lead his family to Heaven.

Be a priest by leading your family in prayer. Be a prophet by teaching the truth of Christ and His Church. Be a king by defending your family from the perversions of the culture, correcting them when they fall into error and by leading them the Eucharist and Reconciliation.

11. Build a brotherhood with other Catholic men in your parish -- In Acts 2:43, the Apostles from the earliest days of the Church give the “formula” for Catholic brotherhood: And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. For a man to grow in faith he must build brotherhood with faithful Catholic men who can challenge and help him grow in holiness.

There is an epidemic of loneliness in modern men, even in regular mass-attending men. Make the commitment to build brotherhood with other Catholic men, particularly younger men, men who are at grave risk as they enter adolescence and move into adulthood.

Gather the men of your parish in large groups and small, to pray, to learn, to teach and to serve the poor.

Be a catalyst, be a leader, working with your priest. Christ will hold all men accountable for their personal response to His command to “Go and make disciples.”

12. Commit to tithing and begin to work toward it -- The willingness of a man to give his hard-earned money to the Church is a direct indicator of the strength of his devotion and loyalty to the King Jesus Christ.
Sadly, many Catholic men give little to the Church, both in absolute terms and relative to other Christian’s gifts to their churches.

Tithing is the giving of 10% of a man’s income to the Church including a parish and other Catholic charities.

While you may not be able to give a full 10% due to economic constraints, commit to tithing and begin to work toward it, making progress each year, guided by the Holy Spirit.

Being a Committed Catholic Man is the greatest challenge to which a man can aspire to accept and the commitment can seem daunting. Don’t be deterred; be a Catholic Man! Make the resolution, right here, right now to be a Committed Catholic Man. Print this list off and post it where you will see it every day.

As in all things, start with prayer. Pray that Jesus Christ will send the Holy Spirit to help give you the strength needed to become a Committed Catholic Man. Pray with your whole heart to Christ and do your best. Our King has promised to answer those who persist in prayer.

Jesus Christ will never let a man down who is committed to Him.

The New Macho

Some thoughts from Boysen Hodgson on true masculinity from The ManKind Project website. I hope to find the book Crisis in Masculinity by Leanne Payne one of these days. My spiritual director recommended it to me so it really must be a good book.

The New Macho

He cleans up after himself.
He cleans up the planet.
He is a role model for young men.
He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic.

He holds himself accountable.
He knows what he feels.
He knows how to cry and he lets it go.
He knows how to rage without hurting others.
He knows how to fear and how to keep moving.
He seeks self-mastery.

He's let go of childish shame.
He feels guilty when he's done something wrong.
He is kind to men, kind to women, kind to children.
He teaches others how to be kind.
He says he's sorry.

He stopped blaming women or his parents or men for his pain years ago.
He stopped letting his defenses ruin his relationships.
He stopped letting his penis run his life.
He has enough self respect to tell the truth.
He creates intimacy and trust with his actions.
He has men that he trusts and that he turns to for support.
He knows how to roll with it.
He knows how to make it happen.
He is disciplined when he needs to be.
He is flexible when he needs to be.
He knows how to listen from the core of his being.

He's not afraid to get dirty.
He's ready to confront his own limitations.
He has high expectations for himself and for those he connects with.
He looks for ways to serve others.
He knows he is an individual.
He knows that we are all one.
He knows he is an animal and a part of nature.
He knows his spirit and his connection to something greater.

He knows that the future generations are watching his actions.
He builds communities where people are respected and valued.
He takes responsibility for himself and is also willing to be his brother's keeper.

He knows his higher purpose.
He loves with fierceness.
He laughs with abandon, because he gets the joke.

Fighting Cultural Manliness

I love this short blog entry from the True Manhood website. Maybe it is high time to re-examine the essence of authentic biblical masculinity vis-a-vis what the culture is trying to portray.


Society makes suggestions to us, either directly or indirectly, about what’s manly and what’s not. Typically, society paints a picture that “cultural manliness” stems from all or part of the following: POWER, MONEY, SEX and STUFF. Society calls a man who possesses these things a “real man”. Separately, and in the right context, these attributes are wonderful, and add nicely to life. When used out of context, they can become disastrous. If a male possesses one (or more) of these attributes, than he automatically racks up points on an invisible ‘man scale’. A given amount of points on the cultural manliness scale doesn’t necessarily gain a guy anything, and it’s not like he can cash those points in for anything tangible. Nor is this something that guys sit around and discuss, it just sort of “is”. It comes from movies and music, TV and the internet. It’s the machismo mindset. However, because of the picture that is painted, a man with lots of points is (for whatever reason) elevated to a higher level than a regular Joe. As this happens, men being elevated and esteemed for what they possess and/or what they have done, other men desire to emulate these “real men” and therefore, “get what he has and do what he’s done.” Other men begin to shoot for power, money, sex and stuff, instead of what really determines what manliness is.

What is real manliness? Or, in our case, true manhood? If real manliness isn’t power, money, sex and stuff, what is it? Where can we find out? What can we do to become really manly? Well, we’re given lots of great examples throughout history of what NOT to do and what’s NOT really manly. Where do we go to find good examples? I’d like to point to a few perfect examples of what manliness is using three Biblical characters.

1. After a storied youth, this man fell away from God and screwed up royally. He engaged in sins of the flesh which led to men dying and problems for others around him. However, instead of remaining lazy and indifferent, he heeded the words of his dear friend and decided to better himself and devoted his life to serving, honoring and praising God. He became faithful, prayerful and humble. He set an example of great virtue for others to see. He, like us, sinned – but repented, asking for forgiveness and continue to grow in holiness.

2. This man was wronged at an early age. After spending many years in confinement for crimes he hadn’t committed, he rose in the ranks and eventually became the king’s trusted advisor. Instead of taking vengeance on the men who wronged him, he chose love, honor and service. This man was a humble and faithful servant to God, never losing his foundation of prayer, trust and faith. An incredible witness of how to work through hardships.

3. This man was given, quite possibly, the hardest task a human father could be given. He was asked to take on a role that no other father had ever been asked to do, but he readily accepted and because he was a virtuous man, he succeeded in this difficult task. Because he trusted God (and His messenger), this man remained faithful and obedient. Due to his successful job-well-done, all men have a perfect example of what it means to be a chaste husband, a loving father and a hard worker.

What is True Manhood? From these three examples, we see a theme: These three men were virtuous. Their virtue (especially their theological virtue of faith) allowed them to persevere and to continue to serve God.

The idea of cultural manliness is that, as you accumulate more wealth, as you sleep with more women, as you buy more stuff and as your power “ranking” goes up, the more manly you are. Cultural manliness never takes into account your virtue, your faith, your relationship with God and/or others, how you treat your wife, children, family, friends, strangers, etc. Cultural manliness is a facade, a lie, a demeaning and empty way of living. The glamour of being a “culturally manly” man will wear off in time. How many people will a culturally manly man hurt along the way?

I call this cultural manliness for a reason, a simple reason. The culture is expressing the thought that everyone, man or woman, is in this world on their own, free to make up their own truth, free to generate their own spirituality from within. A man simply goes after what he wants, and his list of wants comes from what gives him pleasure. Seeking pleasure is what drives his actions and pleasure is often the only motive behind actions.

The Biblical characters described above are, in order: King David, Joseph of the Old Testament and St. Joseph, Patron Saint of Fathers and Workers.

What Is True Masculinity?

Two Sundays ago we had a talk on True Masculinity and True Femininity and for this week it's all about masculinity. This lecture provides additional inputs to that teaching in a concise and structured manner summarizing and highlighting all the relevant points of the discussion in numbers and bullets.

"WHAT IS TRUE MASCULINITY?"

I. THE STRENGTH, LIFE AND HEALTH OF THE CHURCH DEPENDS LARGELY ON HOW WE AS MEN FULFILL OUR ROLES AS SPIRITUAL LEADERS.

A. The success of our homes and marriages depends greatly on the quality of our spiritual lives.
B. God has assigned and delegated to us a profound and sobering responsibility.
C. If we fail in our roles as spiritual leaders, our families will suffer and so will the character of the Church.

II. AS WE SHALL PROVE, GOD CREATED MAN FIRST AND MADE HIM TO BE THE HEAD— TO BE THE AGGRESSOR.

A. Under God's rule, he has been made responsible.
B. Whether or not he succeeds, depends on how well he discharges his calling and duty.
C. NOTE: When a marriage crumbles, first and foremost God holds the man accountable.

III. THE PURPOSE OF THIS LECTURE IS TO DEFINE THE MEANING OF TRUE MASCULINITY.

A. To describe the role that God intended for man to play.
B. To outline the job, calling and duties of a "real masculine leader."
C. To disclose the awesome responsibility God envisioned for man when He created Adam.

IV. LET US FIRST LOOK AT OUR TRAGIC, MIXED-UP WORLD TODAY.

A. Newspapers, magazines, TV & the movies picture men as henpecked dolts, dominated and ruled over by women.
B. They are weak in moral, mental and physical character.
C. By abdicating their roles, they have forced women into unnatural leadership positions, producing frustration, resentment and shame.

V. THIS SAD STATE OF AFFAIRS WAS PROPHESIED CENTURIES AGO.

A. Isa. 3:1-3 — "For behold, the Lord...doth take away...the mighty man, and the man of war, the judge...the captain of fifty, and the honorable man...."
1. The marginal reference for 'the honorable man' renders this phrase as a man eminent in countenance.
2. This phrase indicates that there would be a lack of men commanding respect (Soncino).
3. This has occurred today.

B. Isa. 3:4-5,12 — "As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them.”
1. These verses again show men to be unqualified for true leadership or rule.
2. They are as unqualified as children to rule, and are effeminate like women. (JFB.)
3. The fact that children can exalt themselves illustrates the appalling lack of true masculine leadership.

C. Isa. 3 :16-17 — "Moreover the Lord saith, Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes...Therefore the Lord will smite with a scab the crown of the head of the daughters of Zion.”
1. These verses depict the state of mind of modern-day women.
2. Have they not become this way because men have relinquished their roles as leaders — a point so clearly emphasized throughout this chapter?

VI. CLEARLY, IN TODAY'S WORLD THE MAJORITY OF MEN HAVE LOST THEIR SPIRITUAL FIBER AND COURAGE AND HAVE TAKEN ON THE SOFT, WEAK AND EFFEMINATE CHARACTERISTICS OF WOMEN.

How vital it is that men in God's Church recapture the value and meaning of true masculinity.

VII. MODERN-DAY MISCONCEPTIONS OF MASCULINITY.

A. Before discussing the characteristics of a true masculine leader, let's examine some false ideas
and notions commonly held today.

B. What real masculinity is not:
1. A swaggering, super-confident macho type, like "The Fonz" on Happy Days.
2. A Schwarzenegger physique.
3. A strong and tough hero like Tarzan, Baretta, James Bond or Superman.
4. A suave, sophisticated playboy and modern-day swinger.
5. A crude and coarse pot-bellied drinker who swears and uses vulgar language.
6. The loud, boisterous, braggart who's forever extolling his virtues and advertising himself.
7. One who is arrogant and fiercely competitive and feels that he must win at all costs.
8. The know-it-all who enjoys intimidating others.
9. The man who's power hungry and who likes to control and order people around.
10. One who lays down the law and domineers, and rules his wife and children with an iron hand.

C. In general, the type who is selfish, arrogant and vain and who likes to impress others with his knowledge, exploits and skills.

VIII. A PROFILE OF TRUE MASCULINITY.

A. True masculinity is playing the role that God intended.

1. Man was physically designed and created to be the head and leader.
a. He has broad shoulders, strong muscles, a sturdy build and is heavier.
b. He is generally taller than the woman so that she has to look up to him.
c. He is virile, rugged and robust, and was designed for action and hard work — to be the protector and provider.
d. He has a deeper voice.
e. He has coarse and hairy skin.

2. God gave him a masculine mentality to match his physical frame.

a. He likes a challenge.
b. He's a planner with daring, aggressive and bold ambitions.
c. He's a deep thinker who likes to tackle and conquer problems.
d. He enjoys rough and rugged activities that test his agility and strength.
e. In short, he is equipped both mentally and physically to be the dominate figure and to lead the woman.

3. In contrast, the woman was designed both physically and mentally to assist the man.

a. She has a softer, more fragile and delicate body.
b. She is smaller in stature and is aptly described as the weaker vessel (I Peter 3:7).
c. Her natural interests (unless perverted) center around her home, family and general domestic duties.
d. She was created to be the man's helpmate and companion.
e. Since she was made from man, God instilled in her heart a desire to assist and please him.

4. Thus, the male was created, both physically and mentally, to lead the woman and be her head.
a. Gen. 2:18,21-24— "The woman was made for man."
b. I Cor. 11:3,8-9 — "Husband is head of the wife."

B. The general characteristics of a masculine leader.

1. Is God-fearing and deeply converted.
a. His supreme desire is to walk with God and keep Him at the center of his life.
b. As he grows in God's likeness, the natural qualities of true masculinity will emerge.
c. As he prays and studies, he will become more cognizant of his role and God-given responsibilities.
d. The negative traits of fear, shyness and inferiority will disappear.
e. Daily he should take on the masculine attributes of his elder Brother, Jesus Christ.
f. II Cor. 3:18— "But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord."

2. Has inner strength, character and stability.
a. He is unshakeable, unmoveable and deeply grounded in the truth.
b. He will not compromise his principles, yield to temptation, or break under pressure.
c. When trials beset him, he trusts God to the end.
d. This type of leader is respected by all and is known far and wide.

3. Is self-assured and confident.
a. This kind of confidence comes from faith in God and from a track record of experience and success.
b. It's a distinct manly trait that carries with it an air of authority.
c. Such a man knows where he's going and what he wants out of life.
d. The opposite sex feels secure in the presence of a man with this brand of confidence.

4. Has purpose, drive and initiative.
a. He has mapped out his life and has established clear-cut goals — he knows where he's headed.
b. With tenacity and vigor, he pushes himself to overcome all obstacles.
c. He does not allow himself to become discouraged, distracted or defeated — "can't" and "impossible" are not a part of his normal vocabulary.
d. His total outlook is positive and upbeat and you sense that you're in the presence of a "winner" — a man with a destiny.

5. Is intelligent and decisive.
a. He has learned how to concentrate and use his mind to its fullest capacity.
b. He cuts through trivia and gets down to essentials — he doesn't procrastinate.
c. This kind of leader tackles a problem head-on and doesn't succumb to frustration and despair.
d. He is alert to opportunity and new doors God may open.
e. He's not afraid to step out in faith and take a calculated risk.
f. The ability to stand up under pressure and make life and death decisions is a distinct masculine trait.

6. Practices self-control.
a. He disciplines his body, controls his time and dictates to circumstances.
b. He is tough on himself and has his life totally in hand.
c. Self-discipline is a hallmark.
d. "No" is one of his most powerful command words.
e. He has a clear set of priorities and puts first things first.

7. Is emotionally mature .
a. He controls his temper, disciplines his moods and monitors his overall attitude.
b. He can roll with the punches and bounce back from defeat.
c. This type of leader doesn't need the constant reassurance, acceptance or recognition of people.
d. He can receive criticism without it destroying him.
e. He doesn't whine, feel sorry for himself or seek the sympathy of others when his
purposes have been thwarted.
f. You will rarely hear him complain about his aches and pains or general health.

8. Is law abiding, conscientious and responsible.
a. He doesn't try to outsmart the IRS or rip off his neighbor in a business deal.
b. He is upright, sincere and always tells the truth.
c. He is dependable — his word is his bond.
d. Being a responsible citizen, he promptly submits to the laws of the land and pays his bills on time.
e. In all areas of human relations, he fears God and reflects sterling character.

9. Uses common sense and good judgment.
a. He possesses an inner sense of knowing when to speak and how to act in almost every situation.
b. Has an ability to size up a problem and cut through to the answer.
c. He is big-minded, thinks long range and is able to grasp the best course of action when making decisions.
d. Has developed a sense of insight, wisdom and sound-mindedness.
e. This is particularly true in the area of human relations — tactful, diplomatic and understanding.

10. Takes charge when necessary.
a. This does not mean he is to usurp another's authority.
b. It does mean he is to have presence of mind in a difficult situation when an appointed leader is not present.
c. He feels a sense of responsibility guided by God's Spirit to uphold the proper standards.
d. He keeps his cool and doesn't fold in a crisis situation.
e. In dating he always takes the lead and demonstrates by his confident manner that he's a protector and a haven of trust.

11. Maintains vigor, vitality and good health.
a. Keeps physically fit.
b. He watches his diet — avoids overeating and resists junk foods.
c. He has a regular program of exercise and gets sufficient sleep.
d. Knowing that stress destroys good health and peace of mind, he strives to maintain a positive mental attitude.
e. Masculinity does not mean developing big muscles, but it does involve maintaining good health.

12. Demonstrates self-respect.
a. Godly self-esteem is a trademark of true masculinity.
b. A leader must have it if he's to win the respect of others.
c. Self-respect is a product of living a clean and wholesome life.
d. It's a mature and inner confidence that comes from integrity and a clear conscience.
e. He displays an air of control and authority over his life and will have little trouble mastering any situation he may encounter.
f. Thus, others will look up to him and will place credence in his character.

IX. A WOMAN'S VIEW OF TRUE MASCULINITY.

A. What makes a man "masculine" to a woman?
B. What is it that makes him a leader and a "real" man?
C. What does her nature cry out for from him?
D. Listed below are some of the qualities that women look for and desire in their male counterparts.

1. A woman was created to want and need a leader.
a. First and foremost she wants him to be deeply converted.
b. To put God first and remind her to do likewise.
c. She wants him to be the head — to know his role and accept it.
d. To take charge because he knows he's innately responsible for her welfare.
e. The masculine leader then is one she can trust, respect and look up to.
f. When he relinquishes his position as head, he causes her to become independent and
aggressive — a role that buries her femininity and makes her miserable.

2. She wants a man that can control her.
a. A woman cannot respect a man that she can dominate and wrap around her little finger.
b. Nor does she respect the man who tries to win her over by groveling at her feet and meekly following her lead.
c. A woman will push until she finds her boundaries.
d. The reason: She wants to know whether she can feel safe and secure with him.
e. She admires a man who will say, "O. K. Lady, that's as far as you go. "
f. A woman will take control and lead if the man doesn't, but be frustrated and unfeminine in doing it.

3. She wants a man who's sensitive to her feelings. (attention guys!)
a. She wants him to realize that she's more delicate and fragile than he and tires more easily.
b. That she's more emotional and can be crushed by harsh correction.
c. That she needs encouragement, appreciation and tender understanding.
d. To be aware that she's given her whole life as his helpmate and needs his reassurance and acceptance.
e. To realize her pressures are just as real and difficult to bear as his, and therefore he should be patient, loving and kind.

4. She finds certain physical qualities masculine.
a. She wants him to look like a man.
b. His hair should not be too long — a borderline haircut shows a borderline attitude.
c. His pants should not fit too tightly, nor his shirt be half unbuttoned.
d. He should have straight shoulders, a straight back, and be physically fit.
e. His voice should be lower and stronger.
f. His body movements should be distinctly masculine — not prissy, delicate or dainty.
g. He should be careful of hygiene, body odor and personal appearance.

5. She wants him to be tough and rugged.
a. A fragile, weak man is unappealing.
b. She is repulsed by tender hands, manicured fingernails and a frail body.
c. The kind of man she loves doesn't mind getting grease on his hands or splinters in his fingers.
d. He can play the role of a mechanic, carpenter, handyman, etc.
e. He doesn't shy away from hard work or difficult tasks — but tackles them head-on with confidence and gusto.
f. He's not to be cruel and abusive, but to be master over his life and circumstances.
g. Strength — physical, mental and spiritual — should characterize his total personality.

6. She admires a man with confidence and inner strength.
a. A woman cannot respect a man who whines, moans and complains about his bad breaks in life.
b. He should carry himself as a man with pride — a confidence based on God, not on vanity or ego.
c. He's a kind of man who walks with authority and purpose.
d. He's aggressive and forceful, yet gentle and willing to listen.
e. In a woman's eyes, inner strength is a major ingredient of masculinity.

7. She wants him to be responsible and protective of her.
a. To look after her safety and welfare.
b. To do little things to let her know he cares — opens the door for her, keeps her car in good repair, does the chores without being asked.
c. He gives counsel and guidance in helping her to make right decisions.
d. To take the lead in handling such problems as bill collectors, door-to-door salesman, and serious conflicts with the children.
e. This type of man is a real gentleman and shows his love and affection in a thousand little ways.
f. NOTE: In a dating situation, a God-fearing man will never try to seduce a woman or
cause her to engage in a wrestling match to fight him off. When he gets too physical,
her respect for him plummets.

8. She wants him to lead her toward God's Kingdom.
a. To be a tower of strength she can lean on and example she can follow.
b. She wants him to correct her in love and to encourage her to develop her full potential.
c. She needs his support in her role as wife and mother.
d. She wants him to keep her in line and not let her frustrations get out of control.
e. The kind of man she greatly respects is one who radiates the qualities of God's Spirit, even though she may have no romantic interest in him whatsoever.
f. In the final analysis, God holds the husband responsible for the spiritual character of his home.

X. A BRIEF DESCRIPTION FROM A WOMAN.
"To be a man is a role. It is a position given by God. 'The head of every man is Christ; and the head of every woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God' (I Cor. 11:3). This position is given by God for a purpose and a function. When a man fills this role, he becomes masculine. The more completely he fills this role, the more masculine qualities he'll develop. If he allows a woman to dominate him (or if he is the type who would), he loses his masculinity.

"'Your desire shall be to your husband, and he shall rule over you' (Gen. 3:16). A woman looks for this leadership; it's the key to what she finds masculine. All the traits, qualities, and definitions of true masculinity create within her a desire to respond, to be led, to be the helpmate God designed her to be.”

XI. FINALLY, IT BEHOOVES US AS MEN IN GOD'S CHURCH TO REASSERT OURSELVES AS GOD-FEARING LEADERS.

A. To get back to the faith once delivered.
B. To recapture the great role and purpose that God intended for man to play from the beginning.
C. To launch on a personal campaign of deep study and prayer in a renewed quest for manhood and leadership.

XII. WHAT, THEN, IS TRUE MASCULINITY?
A. It is taking on the life, nature and character of God and Jesus Christ.
B. Let's re-dedicate our lives to this end.
C. Let's become "real" men!

-END-

Acknowledgment: Mr. Rice's Notebook